I was finally starting to feel little bit better.
I got caught up on my homework, caught up on the laundry, spring cleaned the girls room, stocked up on groceries, and made it to everyone’s therapy session this week. I was looking forward to spending the weekend drafting proposals for my last two courses of graduate school. But there’s always something to keep things from being perfect.
Today, I have mastitis. It feels horrible. Have you ever been in so much pain that you wanted to tear off a body part? Well, if what they say about the Amazon warriors is true I would get rid of the pain and throw a wicked javelin for doing so.
It feels like there is an anvil hanging off my breast. My body aches, I have a migraine, I keep getting chills. My stomach hurts so badly I do not want to eat, my stomach hurts because I haven’t eaten. I cannot win for losing. Am I complaining? Maybe I am. I don’t remember mastitis ever being a this bad.
I’ve gotten mastitis four times now in my 48 month nursing career. I’ve taken antibiotics before, but I would really like to avoid taking antibiotics while Nohra is so young, and even if I wanted to fill a prescription, my primary care doctor is out on sick leave, for cancer. I called her office today, since it’s Friday, just in case the pain intensifies over the weekend (if that’s even possible), but they will not give me a prescription without coming in. The office is over an hour away, it’s closed on the weekends, and we have trouble making it to places 20 minutes away unscathed. I would just switch primary care providers, but my doctor referred me to my cardiologists, and finding a new provider could back up my appointments with my cardiologist. Sigh.
I’m putting hot compresses on it, massaging it although it feels like masochism. I’m still nursing from it, and trying to save as much energy as I can. I really don’t want this to get me down. I was feeling so good about being caught up and being able to get ahead this weekend. Two steps forward, three steps back. But I’m still committed this journey, and I’ll get where I want to be eventually.